How to Not Qualify for a Mortgage

Diane Buchanan • September 18, 2018

If you have no desire at all to qualify for a mortgage, here are some great ways to make sure you don’t accidentally end up buying a house and taking out a mortgage to do so.

One of the best ways to ensure you won’t qualify for a mortgage is to be unemployed. Yep, banks hate lending money to unemployed people! Okay, so you have a job. Well, that’s okay, you can always unexpectedly quit your job just as you are trying to arrange financing! Even if you are making a lateral move, or taking a better job than the one you have now, that’s cool… any change in employment status while you are looking to get a mortgage will most likely wreck your chances of getting a mortgage for a while. This is because lenders want to see stability; they want to know that you have been in your current position for some time, that you are past probation, and that everything is working out well. By changing jobs right when you are looking to buy a property, you won’t instil the lender with confidence, and they probably won’t give you a mortgage. Mission accomplished.

Don’t wanna buy a house? Well, then it’s best you don’t save any money. Better yet, you should probably borrow as much money on credit as you can. One of the main qualification points on a mortgage is called your debt-service ratio. Simply put, the more money you owe in consumer debt, the less money you will qualify to borrow on a mortgage, because your ratio of income compared to your debt is higher when you owe more money. Consider this permission to go and finance a Harley-Davidson. Do it, right now. Not a big fan of motorcycles? That’s cool; a Ford 150 should do the trick nicely. The key here is to make sure you add as much monthly payment as you can. The bigger the payment, the better. 

But let’s say that unfortunately your debt-service ratios are in line, you have been able to save up the necessary 5% down payment, and you are on your way to buying a house. What do you do? Ugly documentation! A great way to make sure your lender feels uncomfortable is to have really terrible bank statements. Typically when proving your down payment, the lender will require 90 days’ history of your account(s), with your name on the statement, showing that you have accumulated the down payment over time. Want to really mess things up? Make sure there are lots of deposits over $1000 that can’t be substantiated. This will look like money laundering. If that doesn’t work, you can always black out your “personal information.” Just use a black Sharpie and make your bank statements look like a classified FBI document. Lenders hate that!

So you’ve got a great job and lots of money… don’t panic, you can still absolutely wreck your chances of qualifying for a mortgage. Just don’t pay any of your bills on time. Seriously, borrow lots of money, and then stop paying! Boom. Why would any lender want to lend you money when you have a great track record of not paying back any of the money you borrow? Now, if this feels morally wrong, okay, here is an ethical way to wreck your credit. Don’t pay that cell phone bill out of principle. We’ve all been there — roaming charges, extra data charges that the cell company added on your bill… choose not to pay this on principle. This is a great way to sink your chances of getting a mortgage, I mean, how are you supposed to know that some collections (like cell phones) will show up on your credit report?

Last, if you want to make sure you never get financing, insist on buying the worst house in a bad neighbourhood. You see, the property you are looking to buy is very important to the lender. If they lend you the money to buy it and you stop making the payments, they will be forced to repossess and sell it. They are going to make sure they can recoup their initial investment. So, a “handyman special, fixer upper, with lots of potential” is a great option. As everyone knows, those words are code for “a giant dump.” Bonus points if you get those terms written in the MLS listing. Yep, insist on buying something that is falling apart and stick to it; don’t ever consider buying a solid home in a good neighbourhood.

a shot of a run-down house on a hill

So there you have it, if you don’t want a mortgage, no problem. Quit your job, borrow lots of money, wreck your credit, and insist on buying a dump.

However, on the off chance you feel homeownership is right for you, contact me anytime , I can help you put a plan in place to avoid these (and many more) mortgage qualification pitfalls.

DIANE BUCHANAN
 Mortgage Broker

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Breaking Down the Real Costs of Homeownership

By Diane Buchanan • May 13, 2026
Don’t Forget About Closing Costs When planning to buy a home, most people focus on saving for the down payment. But the truth is, that’s only part of the equation. To actually finalize the purchase, you’ll also need to budget for closing costs —the out-of-pocket expenses that come up before you get the keys. Closing costs can add up quickly, which is why they should be part of your pre-approval conversation right from the start. Lenders will even require proof that you’ve got enough funds set aside. For example, if you’re getting an insured (high-ratio) mortgage, you’ll need at least 1.5% of the purchase price available in addition to your down payment. That means a 10% down payment actually requires 11.5% of the purchase price in cash to make everything work. Let’s break down some of the most common expenses you should prepare for: 1. Home Inspection & Appraisal Inspection : Paid by you, this gives peace of mind that the property is in good shape and doesn’t have hidden problems. Appraisal : Required by the lender to confirm value. Sometimes this is covered by mortgage insurance, sometimes by you. 2. Legal Fees A lawyer or notary is required to handle the title transfer and make sure the mortgage is properly registered. Legal fees are often one of the larger closing costs—unless you’re also responsible for property transfer tax. 3. Taxes Many provinces charge a property or land transfer tax based on the home’s purchase price. These fees can range from hundreds to thousands of dollars, so you’ll want to factor them in early. 4. Insurance Property insurance is mandatory—lenders won’t release funds without proof that the home is insured on closing day. Optional coverage like mortgage life, disability, or critical illness insurance may also be worth considering depending on your financial plan. 5. Moving Costs Whether you’re renting a truck, hiring movers, or bribing friends with pizza and gas money, moving comes with expenses. Cross-country moves especially can be surprisingly pricey. 6. Utilities & Deposits Setting up new services (electricity, water, internet) can involve connection fees or deposits, particularly if you don’t already have a payment history with the utility provider. Plan Ahead, Stress Less This list covers the big-ticket items, but every purchase is unique. That’s why it pays to have an accurate estimate of your personal closing costs before you make an offer. If you’d like help planning ahead—or want a breakdown tailored to your situation—let’s connect. I’d be happy to walk you through the numbers and make sure you’re fully prepared.

Getting a Mortgage Shouldn’t Be Stressful—We Can Help

By Diane Buchanan • May 6, 2026
Buying a Home? Follow These 6 Key Steps for a Smooth Experience Buying a home is likely one of the biggest financial decisions you’ll ever make. It’s exciting—but it can also be overwhelming, especially when it comes to understanding how mortgage financing works. To help make the process smoother (and far less stressful), here are six essential steps every homebuyer should follow: 1. Start With a Mortgage Professional—Not MLS It’s tempting to start your home search by scrolling through listings and booking showings—but the real first step should be speaking with an independent mortgage professional . Unlike a bank that offers only one set of products, an independent mortgage expert has access to multiple lenders and options . That means better advice, better rates, and a better chance of finding a mortgage that truly fits your needs. 2. Build a Personalized Mortgage Plan Unless you’re buying your home with cash, you’ll need a solid financing strategy. That means: Reviewing your credit score Running affordability calculations Exploring different mortgage types, terms, and features Understanding down payments and closing costs The sooner you start planning, the more confident you’ll feel. Don’t wait until you’ve found the “perfect” property— get ahead of the process now . 3. Figure Out What You Can Actually Afford What a lender says you can borrow doesn’t always match what you can comfortably pay each month. Take a close look at your budget, lifestyle, and spending habits. Think about how your mortgage payments, property taxes, utilities, and other costs will fit into your everyday cash flow. Avoid the stress of being house-poor by knowing your real-life affordability , not just your paper pre-approval. 4. Get Pre-Approved the Right Way A true mortgage pre-approval isn’t just entering numbers into an online calculator. It means: Completing a mortgage application Submitting all your required documentation Having a mortgage professional fully assess your file When you’re officially pre-approved, you’ll shop for homes with confidence , knowing what you qualify for and that you’re financially ready. 5. Submit Your Documents Promptly and Stay Flexible Once you find a property and your offer is accepted, time is of the essence. That’s when all the upfront work you’ve done really pays off. Be ready to: Provide additional documentation if requested Respond to your mortgage professional quickly Stay flexible and proactive throughout the approval process Your lender needs to verify everything before finalizing the loan, so staying organized is key. 6. Don’t Make Big Financial Changes Before Closing Once you’ve secured financing and waived your conditions, freeze your finances until after you get the keys. Seriously—don’t: Change jobs Apply for new credit Take out a loan Make a large withdrawal Even small changes can throw off your approval. Keep everything status quo until you officially take possession. Recap: 6 Steps to a Smooth Home Purchase Connect with an independent mortgage professional Create a mortgage plan early Know what you can afford (not just what you qualify for) Get fully pre-approved Stay on top of documentation Avoid major financial changes before possession Ready to Buy with Confidence? If you’re thinking about buying a home—or just want to know what’s possible—let’s talk. I’ll help you map out a personalized plan that makes your homebuying journey feel simple, strategic, and stress-free. Reach out anytime. I’d love to help you get started.